


A Touch of Agony

by MzRogueRaz (EggplantRed)



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age II
Genre: Implied Sexual Content, Memories, Other, Repressed Memories
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-30
Updated: 2020-10-30
Packaged: 2021-03-08 22:00:50
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 448
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27283816
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EggplantRed/pseuds/MzRogueRaz
Summary: A passionate night with Hawke brought him to the brink of something he couldn't recover from...
Relationships: Fenris/Hawke (Dragon Age)





	A Touch of Agony

The memories were tearing at the fringes of his mind as his body felt passion he hadn’t known outside of anger in recent times. It was terrifying but he didn’t know how to stop the pain without having to part with the pleasure and he didn't want to let it go just then. Not stopping wasn’t the best decision but he thought it best then. He could deal with it when everything was over. It was no fault of Hawke’s but in entangling himself with them, something awoke in Fenris and he couldn’t halt it. His control was slipping more and more as the pleasure increased. Just a little bit longer he told himself and then he’d figure out what was happening with him.

As Hawke slumped over him, the two of them panting, Fenris wanted to be in the moment but couldn’t. Now that his body was no longer occupied, his mind began to spiral. He didn’t know what was happening to him. These flashbacks of life before, it was all too much. He needed to get away with his thoughts. Hawke had rolled over beside him and he wanted to reach out but pulled his hand back at the last second. He needed to leave, to be alone. He needed to figure out what was happening to him.

Fenris laid there, staring at the canopy, until soft snoring and the crackling of the fire were the only sounds in the quarters. Slowly rolling out of bed, he carefully slipped his armor back on and sat on the chest near the fireplace. It’s all too much he told himself. Too vivid, too much, too fast. He didn’t know how else to describe it but it was overwhelming. Hawke had done nothing but help him since they’d met under false pretenses in the alienage that night. They’d been there helping him, listening to him, and yet tonight he had to walk away from them. Every flash of a life he’d forgotten had come back within grasp only to slip through his fingers again. Fenris couldn’t, _no wouldn’t_ , go through that again. He was hurt and confused and upset and had to be honest no matter the consequence. Hawke had been one of the best things to happen to him in years but he was prepared to leave it all behind. It wouldn’t be easy but it would be easier than the alternative, or so he was thinking.

“I’ll wait for them to wake.”

Fenris mumbled to himself as he sat in thought surrounded by the shadows in the room. Being honest was the least he could do in the face of the anguish he was about to cause.


End file.
